Quantum Diaries

I contributed to an interesting project yesterday – the3six5 is a diary of 2010 written worldwide by a new person each day who also submits a photo that encompasses the feeling. My day was relatively relaxing after a busy week on Birmingham’s Entrepreneurship and Enterprise summer school. The spirit of what I wrote can be contained in the fact that I did the course in the first place though – I am about to be thrown into the employment pool and I will need to adapt to stand out in the right places. A role-playing game with friends reminded me of the fact. Yet, with Phil by my side it feels less terrifying to be facing it together. The entry went like this:

August is finally here. The wave of summer weddings is dying down. I’ll be 25 in a few weeks. Only two more months of my PhD left. Only two more months before Phil and I really need to be moving out, starting new jobs, beginning the rest of our lives together. No jobs lined up yet but we’ll work something out.

It’s been a lazy day: I went with friends to Owen’s to play a fantasy roleplaying game he’s been pushing for us to try. We armed ourselves as best we could for surviving in a modern but crazed world – my character was my usual mischievous thief, one of us was an ex- veteran, one was a martial-arts monk and one even specialised in biology and was carrying a flesh-eating virus just in case it came in handy. Yet, the game transported us to a new world, leaving us almost entirely helpless. The time came when we had to abandon hope of returning home and instead make our goal to kill off immediate zombie-like dangers and carve out a home in this inhospitable place.

It got me thinking: The world feels very scary these days – nearly enough everyone I know has been at least a little bit affected by the economic crisis. New government is clearly not making any exceptions in cuts, and a lot of people are being made redundant all over the place. It’s already fairly unavoidable that to stay in this country my early career in heavy- ion physics will have to change direction. I can’t say I feel so confident about finding my way outside academia right now.

To get through the next few years, we are going to have to adapt quickly. Many of us will have to adapt our dreams too, to fit with what is possible. I got home quite late, feeling a little wired and fed only on snacks and coffee. Phil was waiting, with the table set and a candle lit, risotto and wine at the ready. I love him so much. Despite lack of physical evidence, it feels like we are turning a corner today. The future is coming and I think we can handle it.